7 Heartfelt Lessons on Leadership, Served with Biscuits from Ted Lasso
- David Guttman
- 5 hours ago
- 14 min read
I've fired people I genuinely liked. I've been betrayed by executives I trusted. I've watched brilliant teams fall apart because the leader couldn't get out of their own way. And through it all, I learned a few things most leadership books won't tell you:
People don't follow your strategy. They follow you.
Leadership isn't about being right. It's about being followed.
Great leadership isn't about what you know. It's about who trusts you.
Which is why Ted Lasso, a fictional soccer coach who bakes biscuits and quotes Walt Whitman, taught me more about effective leadership than my Wharton MBA ever did.
People love to point to Elon Musk and Steve Jobs as proof that demanding, autocratic leadership works. And they're right. For them. But those are exceptions; outliers who succeeded despite their methods, not because of them. For the rest of us building companies and leading teams, I've learned through three Inc. 500 companies and multiple eight- and nine-figure exits that the most effective leadership style is the one most people fear trying.
Servant leadership. The kind that makes you vulnerable.
Ted Lasso is the quintessential servant leader. This philosophy demonstrates that the highest purpose of a leader is not to command, but to serve those they lead. Success becomes a side effect of cultivating individual flourishing, not the goal itself.
Here are seven essential leadership lessons from Ted Lasso, with the hard-won insights from applying them in the real world.
1. Authenticity is the True Superpower
You can't create real human connection without authenticity, and authenticity demands vulnerability.
People willingly follow those they trust, and they only trust people when they see your genuine self; not some polished, artificial facade. By choosing vulnerability and authenticity, you demonstrate that being imperfect is normal, giving everyone permission to be human.
After the heartbreak of his team being relegated to a lower league, Ted shares with Rebecca his homesickness and fear of failing his son Henry. "I feel like I'm just a tourist in my own life sometimes." This small crack in his otherwise sunny demeanor creates a connection where Rebecca can't help but see Ted in a more human light. Moved by his vulnerability, Rebecca confesses her ongoing efforts to sabotage him and the team. Her honesty and authenticity give Ted the space he needs to forgive her. What results is a friendship that forges an unbreakable bond, with her championing Ted's vision that ultimately leads to better ownership decisions and the team's eventual rise.
Leaders often underestimate how impactful sharing who they are with their team members can humanize them and make a connection there is no other way to create.
I've shed tears in front of my team. I've admitted when I was wrong or made a mistake. I've asked for help when I needed it. And my teams have followed me through acquisitions, pivots, near-bankruptcies, and explosive growth. Not because I was perfect but because I was real.
2. Kill Your Ego or It Will Kill Your Leadership
The moment your ego takes control, you stall learning. You stop taking in new information. And that's when you start making bad decisions that can ruin your company.
If you're emotionally invested in being right, you can't be curious about what's true. Your ego becomes a filter that only lets through information that confirms what you already believe. Every warning sign gets dismissed. Every piece of contradicting data gets rationalized away. And by the time reality forces you to pay attention, it's often too late.
Real leaders leave their ego at the door. They admit when they've made a mistake. They deflect credit and absorb blame. They treat failure as information, not a character judgment. These aren't separate skills. They're all the same thing; keeping your ego in check so you can see what's happening.
Following a crushing penalty shootout loss to Liverpool, Ted gathered his dejected team. He doesn't sugarcoat the pain but reframes it, saying, "Heartbreak's just life trying to teach you something new about love. For the game, for each other." No blame. No excuses. Just learning.
When Roy Kent lashes out at a young player for a costly mistake during training, Ted intervenes with his signature advice, "Be a goldfish." He explains that goldfish forget mistakes in seconds, allowing them to learn without the baggage of regret. The message is clear; your ego wants to punish mistakes. Your leadership should want to learn from them.
At a press briefing, Ted fields tough questions with self-deprecating humor and accountability, saying things like, "I got a lot to learn about this game, but that's on me, not these fellas." He absorbed the blame to shield his team from scrutiny. Seeing their leader take the blame for things they could have done better only makes the team want to try harder to get it right the next time.
Here's what most leaders get wrong. They think absorbing blame when someone else failed is unfair. Their ego also wants credit for the wins.
Neither is the right leadership approach.
As the leader, you decide who is on the team. Who is hired. Who is fired. Who is promoted. Who is given which responsibilities. That means everything that goes poorly is your responsibility. If your hire made a mistake, you hired wrong. If your process failed, you designed it. If your team executed poorly, you didn't set them up for success.
Deflecting credit and absorbing blame isn't just a technique. It's the truth. No leader accomplishes anything alone. The team does the execution. The credit is rightfully theirs. As the final decision maker, all blame is rightfully yours.
Besides, there are real benefits to this approach. The moment you start punishing failure, your team stops taking risks. And without risk, you stifle innovation. When things go wrong, real leadership is about understanding how to avoid similar mistakes in the future. Not punishing the person who is taking calculated risks.
When led correctly teams either win or they learn.
3. True Leadership is 30% Therapist
Any effective leader in a senior position needs to be prepared to function as at least 30% therapist.
Your job isn't to solve their problems. It's to provide resources and remove obstacles, including personal ones, that are holding them back. As a leader, you aren't leading an employee, you are leading a person.
Ted always focuses on the person first. He does this for two reasons. First, that is the type of leader Ted wants to be. He loves his players and wants the best for them. "Success is not about the wins and losses. It's about helping these young fellas be the best versions of themselves, on and off the field."
Second, he knows through experience that when your team understands that they come first, you will get the best version of them. Those that have the right "why" can endure almost any "how."
The episode where Dubai Air becomes a team sponsor might be the best example of how a leader's role as therapist wins the day. Sam Obisanya, one of the team's star players, learns that Dubai Air is owned by a company responsible for environmental harm to his home country of Nigeria. Sam feels enormously conflicted about wearing the sponsor's logo on his uniform. This moral challenge has a profound effect on his focus and performance.
Instead of imposing his authority, Ted listens without judgment, creating a safe environment for Sam to express his values and emotions, and empowers Sam to make his own decision rather than dictating what to do. When Sam decides to cover the sponsor's logo and publicly stand against Dubai Air, Ted supports him, and as a result the team rallies behind Sam.
Ted's handling of the Sam situation shows that effective leaders act like therapists by creating trust, offering emotional safety, while enabling others to safely act in alignment with their principles. It is leadership through empathy, empowerment and protection. Because this puts the sponsorship at risk, there was no better way for Ted to demonstrate that the players come first. That type of leadership is what creates the loyalty and focus that generates next level results.
To persuade, inspire, and motivate your team, you must understand how they see the world. Truly knowing your team enhances communication, and a team that feels understood and appreciated will perform at their absolute best. But understanding requires listening, and listening requires time, and time feels like a luxury when you're trying to hit quarterly targets.
It's not a luxury. It's the foundation. The 30% therapist work you do today creates the 200% performance you get tomorrow.
4. Servant Leadership Demands Higher Standards, Not Lower Ones
Here's what people get wrong about servant leadership. They think it's soft. They think it means accepting subpar results. They think caring about your people means you can't hold them accountable.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
While Ted Lasso cares deeply about his players, it doesn't effect his decision making. He benches Jamie Tartt when his ego damages the team. He demotes Roy Kent when age catches up to him.
When Nate leaked to the press about Ted's panic attacks out of jealousy, he finds just the right balance of accountability without anger. In a private office sit-down, Ted locks eyes and says, "I need you to own this, Nate. We're a team, but trust is earned every day." No yelling, no demotion. Just firm boundaries that guide Nate to apologize and rebuild.
Servant leadership means you serve your people's growth, not their comfort. There's a massive difference. Caring about your people means having the hard conversations. It means holding them to high standards because you believe they're capable of meeting them. It means not letting them fail slowly when you can see they're in over their head.
5. Lead from the Front, Even When the Task is Small
A true leader is defined by action, modeling the behavior expected of the team.
This means recognizing that no role is beneath you and is a valuable activity so long as it moves the mission forward. Your team pays more attention to what you do than what you say. At work, when people see you rolling up your sleeves to help with their job, they know what they do matters.
Every morning, Ted delivers Rebecca a box of homemade biscuits. This small, relentless act demonstrates effort and care in a tangible way. It would be easy to delegate. It would be easy to skip. But Ted shows up, every single day, with something he made with his own hands. That consistency speaks louder than any speech about commitment ever could.
The darts scene with ex-owner Rupert Mannion perfectly captures what leading from the front looks like. Rupert, an expert player, taunts Ted into a high-stakes game. If Rupert wins, he picks the starting lineup and humiliates Rebecca. Ted steps into the fire without hesitation.
This is what leading from the front looks like. Not standing behind your team and giving orders. Not delegating the hard stuff to someone else. Stepping up when the stakes are highest and saying, "I've got this."
Ted wins the game and drops his iconic Walt Whitman quote, "Be curious." But the real lesson isn't about darts. It's about being willing to put yourself on the line for your team. Ted could have refused the challenge thinking it too risky. Instead, he defended his team's and Rebecca's honor, and in typical Ted Lasso fashion, turned a challenge into a teaching moment.
Your team watches what you do when things get hard. When there's an angry customer on the phone, do you take the call or hide behind your support team? When there's a menial task that needs doing, do you roll up your sleeves or walk past it expecting someone else to handle it? When someone attacks your team publicly, do you step in front of them or let them take the hit?
Leading from the front doesn't mean you have to be the best at everything. It means you show up when it matters, especially when the task feels beneath your title. It means you're willing to do the work you ask others to do. It means your team never has to wonder if you'll have their back when things get tough.
Your team will remember what you did more than what you said.
6. Leadership Requires Playing by the Same Rules
In the long run, individuals will only voluntarily follow someone they trust. You destroy that trust when there are two sets of rules. One for the C-suite and one for everyone else.
People crave fairness. When Jamie Tartt behaves in a way that harms the team, Ted benches him mid-game. Jamie is their star player and their best chance at winning. But Ted doesn't create a special set of rules for talent. If you're hurting the team, you sit. Doesn't matter if you score the most goals or you’re the water boy. Same standards for everyone. And Ted walks the talk. When he asks players to be punctual, he's always early. When he asks for commitment, he's the first to arrive and last to leave.
We've all heard of the senior executive who hires their brother, best friend or even mistress and gives them special treatment. Or keeps their private chef, personal trainer and stylist on the company payroll, but asks the executive team to cut people and reduce salaries because the company is falling short of profitability targets. When good people lose sleep over paying their mortgage so the C-suite can cover their mistakes without accountability, you devastate your organization's morale. When your best leaders see behavior like this, they leave.
If you want to be an effective leader, you must lead by example and play by the same rules as everyone else. No exceptions.
7. Empower People, Look for Opportunities to Elevate
A good leader knows to empower talented people with as much decision-making authority as possible. As a leader, your job isn't to have all the answers. It's to listen to your team and guide them towards success.
But great leaders go a step further and find ways to elevate people, so their team members are driven to stretch and grow. Great leaders are never afraid their subordinates will outshine them. They expect and welcome it.
Perhaps the best example of this in Ted Lasso is when Nate brings detailed notes to Ted on what he thinks the team needs to do to start winning.
Ted says, "I read through your thoughts."
Nate responds, "Yeah."
Ted continues, "They're great. And I agree with every last one of 'em. But I can't say this to them."
Nate protests, "But they need to hear it."
Ted agrees, "I agree. That's why you're gonna do it."
Nate is shocked, "Are you drunk?"
Ted smiles, "You're giving the pregame talk."
Ted knew Nate had the right plan. Because Ted was comfortable as a leader, the easier path for him would have been to take Nate's ideas and present them to the team. Even if he had given Nate credit for the ideas, it would still have been a half measure. What Ted chose to do instead was to elevate Nate. To amplify Nate's voice and build his confidence. This earned instant respect from the team and set the stage for Nate's full promotion to assistant coach soon after. With one thoughtful and deliberate act, he turned a quiet contributor into a valuable team leader.
When you elevate people, you're not risking them outshining you. You're building a following of exceptional people you can tap into when the right opportunity presents itself. One way to identify a great leader is they have people that follow them from company to company. When you see in others what they cannot see in themselves, and help them achieve results they honestly didn't think possible, you will have people in your network that will provide value throughout your career.
Your job isn't to be the smartest person in the room. Your job is to help everyone on your team become the best version of themselves.
The Hard Truth About Servant Leadership
I know what you're thinking. This sounds like it takes too much time. This sounds like it makes the hard decisions, like firing people, even more difficult.
These are understandable objections. Let me address them.
Objection 1: "If I'm friends with my team, I can't fire them when I need to."
True friends don't expect special treatment. In fact, they reject it. The problem isn't friendship. The problem is communication and boundaries.
Firing people is hard. But it's easier when you've been honest with them all along. When someone knows where they stand, when they know you've tried to help them succeed, they respect the decision even if they don't like it. The hard part isn't firing friends. The hard part is firing people you've lied to about their performance because you were afraid of the conversation.
Objection 2: "This takes too much time. I don't have time to be a therapist."
You're right. You don't have time. Which is why you're constantly dealing with turnover, poor performance, and cultural problems that cost you 10x more time than a few difficult conversations would have.
The 30% therapist work isn't extra time. It's the time that saves you from constant firefighting. Would you rather spend one hour understanding why your VP is underperforming or six months recruiting and onboarding a replacement?
Objection 3: "This makes you look weak."
The weakest leaders I've seen are the ones who can never admit they've made a mistake. The ones who double down on bad decisions because changing course might make them look indecisive or highlight their errors. Weakness is hiding behind your title, your expertise, your authority.
Vulnerability isn't weakness. It's courage. When people can see you care, they aren't thinking you are weak. They see a leader that is comfortable in their own skin. They see a leader they want to follow into battle.
A Leadership Challenge
Pick one person on your team. Someone who's struggling, underperforming, or just not quite themselves lately.
Block off an hour. Take them for coffee. And ask one question.
"What's going on?"
Then shut up and listen. Don't solve. Don't advise. Just listen.
See what happens.
Or next time you're in a meeting and someone on your team has a great idea, let them present it. Even if you could present it better. Even if it would be faster to do it yourself. Elevate them instead.
Or next time something goes wrong, and you know exactly whose fault it was, absorb the blame publicly. Then coach them privately.
Pick one. Try it for 30 days. And see if your team responds differently.
Because here's what I've learned. This kind of leadership is hard. You'll absorb blame you don't fully deserve. You'll deflect credit you earned. You'll care about people who might betray you. You'll invest time in someone who might leave anyway.
But you'll also build teams that will run through walls for you. You'll create cultures where people do their best work. And you'll sleep at night knowing you led with integrity.
The Bottom Line
I've been leading teams for over 30 years. I have done it the wrong way, and I have done it the right way.
Only one approach built teams that followed me from company to company. Only one approach let me look at myself in the mirror without flinching. Only one approach generated the kind of exceptional results that created dozens of millionaires in the companies I have led.
Servant leadership isn't the easy path. It's the effective path.
People know whether you actually care about them or not. They can tell when you're going through the motions versus when you are genuinely invested in their success. And when they know you care, when they trust you've got their back, when they see you living the same standards you demand of them, they will move mountains for you.
Ted Lasso got it right. The best leaders serve their teams. The best leaders control their egos instead of letting their egos control them. The best leaders care enough to have the hard conversations, set high standards, and invest in people who might leave them anyway.
Because that's what real leadership looks like.
Be curious, not judgmental. Be vulnerable, not perfect. Be there for your people, not above them.
At the end of your career, your team won't remember your strategy. They'll remember how you made them feel. And you'll remember whether you led like someone you'd want to follow.

David Guttman is a serial entrepreneur, executive leader, and business strategist with decades of experience building, scaling, and exiting 8- and 9-figure companies. Over a 35-year career, he has bought and sold 15 businesses and raised more than $25 million across industries as varied as fintech, edtech, crypto, and healthtech. His core skill is applying sound business fundamentals to drive results in virtually any industry or market condition.
A 3x Inc. 500 entrepreneur and 2x TEDx speaker—with one talk ranking among the top 1% most-viewed of all time—David holds a bachelor's degree in computer science from Brown University and an MBA from the Wharton School. He is also a sought-after mentor and hosts two weekly podcasts, one ranked in Apple's top 50 in the Business category, where he interviews C-suite executives and other purpose-driven leaders on how to grow personally and professionally.



















